I have been struggling lately to keep my attention on one subject longer than 2.5 seconds. Ever had a day like that? Well, I’ve had a few months. Ok, years.
Did you just see that butterfly?
I’m sorry….what was I saying?
Yep, that about sums it up.
I can barely form a cohesive, coherent thought so as to complete my daily tasks, much less put words down on my blog. I know, you probably haven’t missed me. But I have missed writing.
I could blame it on the fact that school has started, and the lazy days of summer are over. I could say it’s because we have so many family activities that I honestly can’t remember the last time we all just SAT DOWN together in the same room. I could blame it on the numerous animals in my life that contribute to the insanity.
In reality, it’s probably all those things, plus my inborn need to overcommit. I can’t say no. Ever. No, I mean….EVER. It’s bad.
In fact, lately, I have a hard time keeping my hand down in a room when somebody asks for volunteers to help. I can feel it creeping up, towards the free air. I have to slap it down with my other hand or sit on it to keep my volunteerism under control. Why do I hear people talking about things that need to be done and have the urge to scream, “I’LL DO IT!!!!” when I can’t even finish my own laundry?
I’ve decided it can all be summed up in one word: avoidance.
I wish I could say I believe it is about my altruistic self. While I like to think I am altruistic, I feel the sinking sensation that my brain hopes that if I keep moving on to new things, the old things will just disappear. Not so much. In fact, quite the opposite.
And therefore, I am making a pledge today to STOP VOLUNTEERING FOR EVERYTHING. I am going to stop raising my hand and adding more things to my list. I am determined. I have made a resolution: No more projects.
Wait….did I just hear someone say they need help with the school play? Wouldn’t that be a blast? I could just help a little….
Ok, so I’m incurable. I just can’t do it. Kudos to those of you who can. You are amazing prioritizers. Is “prioritizers” a word? I didn’t think so. But it just fit.
So here I go. I’m off to get some stuff done.
Yea, not really….I’m sitting here, sipping a Pumpkin Spice Latte, doing a little “people listening.” It’s one of my favorite things to do when I have about a million other things I should be doing. And while we’re on the topic, I have to ask…have you ever heard a voice come out of someone and thought, “that is totally not the right voice for her?” That just happened in my “people listening” session, and I’m trying not to be freaked out. Weird. Ok, I know. Random, again.
On a side note, in keeping with my new “randomness” theme, my next few posts are going to stray from the chickens a bit. I’m sad to say the chickens are not always the center of my life. Please don’t cry. I promise to throw them in here and there, because I seriously do continue to learn something from them daily.
I’m also doing away with the “Chapter ….” blog title thing I started. It seemed clever at the time, but it’s WEARING ME OUT. And when things wear me out, I stop them (a little trick I’ve learn with age).
Hang with me. It makes me smile when I hear people say they like my blog. Writing is hard for me. I wish it was easy, but I’m a perfectionist. I want it to be “just right.” And therefore, it is a painstaking process. For those of you who have given me kind words, I can’t express how much I appreciate you. Thank you.
And now….stay tuned for my upcoming posts, including “The Dog Who Ate Everything.” It promises to be a blockbuster…..
Hugs and blessings always,
LITTLE JEN in the BIG WOODS
I do really enjoy your blog. I look forward to each new one. Thanks for the entertainment.